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| Songs... |
| 04.27.04 (9:00 am) [edit] |
Robbie Williams' most decent songs, so far... And, yes, I can relate...
BETTER MAN
Send someone to love me
I need to rest in arms
Keep me safe from harm
In pouring rain
Give me endless summer
Lord I fear the cold
Feel I'm getting old
Before my time
As my soul heals the shame
I will grow through this pain
Lord I'm doing all I can
To be a better man
Go easy on my conscience
'Cause it's not my fault
I know I've been taught
To take the blame
Rest assured my angels
Will catch my tears
Walk me out of here
I'm in pain
As my soul heals the shame
I will grow through this pain
Lord I'm doing all I can
To be a better man
Once you've found that lover
You're homeward bound
Love is all around
Love is all around
I know some have fallen
On stony ground
But Love is all around
Send someone to love me
I need to rest in arms
Keep me safe from harm
In pouring rain
Give me endless summer
Lord I fear the cold
Feel I'm getting old
Before my time
As my soul heals the shame
I will grow through this pain
Lord I'm doin' all I can
To be a better man
ANGELS
I sit and wait
Does an angel contemplate my fate
And do they know
The places where we go
When we're grey and old
'cos I have been told
That salvation lets their wings unfold
So when I'm lying in my bed
Thoughts running through my head
And I feel the love is dead
I'm loving angels instead
And through it all she offers me protection
A lot of love and affection
Whether I'm right or wrong
And down the waterfall
Wherever it may take me
I know that life won't break me
When I come to call she won't forsake me
I'm loving angels instead
When I'm feeling weak
And my pain walks down a one way street
I look above
And I know I'll always be blessed with love
And as the feeling grows
She breathes flesh to my bones
And when love is dead
I'm loving angels instead
And through it all she offers me protection
A lot of love and affection
Whether I'm right or wrong
And down the waterfall
Wherever it may take me
I know that life won't break me
When I come to call she won't forsake me
I'm loving angels instead
And through it all she offers me protection
A lot of love and affection
Whether I'm right or wrong
And down the waterfall
Wherever it may take me
I know that life won't break me
When I come to call she won't forsake me
I'm loving angels instead
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| Day... |
| 04.27.04 (8:50 am) [edit] |
Today… I enrolled… I went to visit Australyn in their house, where I waited for 3 hours because she and her mother went to Quiapo first to buy some things they needed… Turns out, it was worth it… She was kind to me as she was before… She has changed so much... It's like she isn't the Australyn I love anymore... I hate it when people change… I miss how we were… Yet, I always believe there is hope even though we have been taking this stormy path for quite a while by now… I still love her… I really do… It’s undeniable… But if it wasn’t for our seven long months together and all the love I invested on her, I don’t think I would be able to continue preserving and reviving my feelings for her… I’m greatly disappointed but there’s always room for improvement… I just hope she tells me the truth so that I can adapt to it… I rode a bus home and then an FX… Perfect time for me to think abstract thoughts… And I never get to share ideas to other people for that reason… My thoughts are more of abstract than numerical or lingual… Sure, I can think with numbers and words if the inputs are also numbers or words… But my natural way of thinking is abstract… Blending emotions with logic… And I find it so hard to convert them to words… While on the ride home, I noticed all the posters all over the… Well, all over everywhere… It’s all for the campaigns for the nearing election… Different candidates, different slogans, different jingles… And yet, it really seems like a big foolishness to me… These are still not enough basis for electing someone… I think it would be better if they just gave each of the candidates a short term in the position they’re running for… Sure, this is still not a perfect way… It still has some flaws… But it would be much better than the Pinoy style of campaigning where candidates fool people by giving them false impressions… I find it really pointless interfering with such matters as politics etc. because I know I can’t do anything to change it for the better… I admire those people who are smart and brave enough to stand up and try to make a change and at the same time, I laugh at them… As they say, “If you can’t beat them, join them”… Some people say I’m such a cynical and pessimistic guy… Well, they might be right… But, that’s the best way I can see to be effective… I look at the worst case scenario of things… That way, I can avoid disappointments in my life… You know, you can’t expect people to act as they ought to be… That’s why I look at people as how they really are… Their sub- intentions, what they try to hide, their natural tendencies etc… Even if I have such utopian beliefs and principles in life…
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| I'm not a mad dog... I'm a mad puppy... Grrrrr... |
| 04.25.04 (7:57 am) [edit] |
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I woke up late, as usual… Regular routine… But, I spent the rest of the day pushing speed limits in my uncle's new scooter... My brother was learning how to drive it... I was trying to make it run as fast as possible... Different theories, different styles and it ran faster but I was not contented... It was getting dark so I decided to take last few round trips and go home... I saw our neighbor riding her scooter too... that girl as old as I am that my other neighbors always envied because they were rich... I remember my friends and I sharing my bike and having such a hard time going up on upwardly slanted roads… I even remembered me working for them in renovating their house and wrecking unwanted structures... She was pretty hostile to me than before... I remembered why... She used to call me when we were neighbors... We were once good friends... But then I started hiding from her when the school year started and finally told her to stop calling if she aint gonna say anything important... Oh, and I almost forgot to mention our old friend that we haven’t seen for quite a while, Randy, a.k.a. “Balong”… He hasn’t changed a bit even though it’s been quite a long time since we last hung around with him… He aint much of a good person… He looks awful, to be honest with you… He aint a smart guy either… Not even street smart… He’s just… Well, he’s just “Balong”… The son of our carpenter neighbor, who already passed away… The 15 yrs old, short and stealthy thief who was responsible for the lost stuff in the neighborhood…But, in time we’ve learned to accept him as he is and appreciate the poor feller… The guy’s harmless… He’s fun to be with… He won’t do u harm when you’re on his side… HEY, PLEASE CORRECT ME IF I'M USING THIS BLOG THING THE WRONG WAY... I LOOK AT IT AS SUM KINDA DIARY... As implied from it's name itself, "blog"... (b -- LOG)
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| My first blog... :) |
| 04.25.04 (7:50 am) [edit] |
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Well, nothing really special today... I woke up late in the afternoon... felt the hot, but humid atmosphere... smelled the mouth- watering scent of the fried hotdogs and eggs and the coffee that wakes me up even just with it's smell... I got up to another boring summer day... took a quick bath... arranged my hair with my hands... Like everything I have, my hair is an organized mess... I did some sit-ups and push-ups... and then proceeded to the basketball court in the plaza... My younger brother was going to teach me how to play... He wanted me in his team next year and he said they would become champions with me... said I had potential... but I knew I sucked in the game... I was improving quite a bit... I had to catch up with them coz they had the advantage of years of experience... I was not playing as "good" as usual coz lately, my girlfriend and I had been having some misunderstandings... It's kinda ironic coz it was her who did me wrong but I'm always the one begging on my knees (I aint gonna tell the whole story)... Im getting really tired with that... I was resting after the game and I amused myself by watching the poor children, probably from the squatter's area nearby, play... Nice, their hairs were dark brown like mine... They're "naturally" brown- haired because of long everyday exposure to the sun... I couldn't help but notice the lovely laughs they had as they chased each other... And so I started to hallucinate... An absurd idea came to me... What if I adopt a young orphan girl... take care of her and invest all my love on her... I would keep her away from this wild world and keep her innocent as she is... But, I will teach her all I know and talk to her all about my beliefs... She would be contented with who I am and with what I have... We would grow up together... Then, maybe someday, I would marry her... age wouldn't matter coz If I am 22, she would probably be 16... Tears fell from my eyes... for me, to love and be loved truly would be paradise... but then, the lovely laughs turned to malevolent, malicious and creepy giggles and horrifying screams and I suddenly woke up as my name echoed all over the covered court... My brother woke me up... I got up and went home... That idea was just impossible and almost unacceptable because first of all, people would insult me and second of all, I am already "unofficially engaged" with my girlfriend... I promised myself that the first will be the last... but, she was giving me such a hard time... (I am describing everything as good as possible here and with least detail)... Later that day, we went to Makati to pick up our scooter from my uncle... They were making it far more complicated than it should be... They didn't want my grandpa to drive it back home because he might get into an accident... You know, he's got slow reflexes coz he's old... AND, they bought a slow 50cc scooter... Turns out, they're increasing the possibility for accidents because they bought a slow one... You know, nobody would be able to go with the speed of the vehicles in the highway with such a slow vehicle... We had a hard time loading it up in the CRV and I got all greased up... I even got muscle pains all over my arms... What a boring, disappointing day... Im only looking forward for tomorrow when my efforts would pay- off and we will get to try the bike... My girlfriend even rejected me when I tried to apologize for something that wasn't even my fault... So, because of my apparent sadness, I decided to make myself a tblog account as an output of my emotions... I wanted just to share a glimpse of my life to people... But, I've decided that the details and other things I've learned and thought are best kept private in my journal... besides, who would care...
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